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Articles written by Phil Callaway

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 By Phil Callaway    Viewpoint 

Finding Rock Bottom

I am an extremely young grandpa. I'm still able to outrun and outjump the grandkids. It helps that they are five and under. When they're worn out from trying to catch me, they say,... — Updated 10/4/2021

 

Put it on

A kid of nine or ten came up to me and told me a joke: "I went to buy some camouflage clothing. But I couldn't find any." It took me a second or two, but finally I laughed. Here's... — Updated 9/2/2021

 

All in the family

I asked my 4-year-old grandson for the highlight of his day. He said, "Growing tobacco." Where he heard this, I'll never know. Here are other unfiltered thoughts from children:... — Updated 6/7/2021

 

Mr. Flynn's Horrible, No Good Day

When I'm having a bad day, I'm glad I'm not alone. At the Fitzwilliam Museum in Cambridge England, a loose shoelace, a lack of handrails and a marble wall conspired to give one... — Updated 3/27/2021

 

Laugh Again

2021 is finally here. Most of us would agree that it couldn't come fast enough. 2020 felt like our mothers gave us a gigantic Time Out. Each morning I woke up to find my wife waitin... — Updated 2/2/2021

 

Laugh Again

"There's darkness down there," our four-year-old granddaughter whispered as she peered down the stairs. She was right. Bright spots on planet earth seem scarce these days. I love ch... — Updated 12/8/2020

 

Phil's Rules for Life

We had plenty of rules when I was growing up. No throwing cheese into the ceiling fan. Stop pouring ketchup on your pancakes. Obey your parents, that it may go well with you and... — Updated 10/14/2020

 

Laugh Again

School. Do we really need it? English? We already speak it. Math? We have calculators. History? Those people are gone. Physical education? We have the great outdoors. Spanish? We... — Updated 8/6/2020

 

Laugh Again

Tabloids do their best to start rumours. Here are a few headlines I'm not making up: "Farmer shoots 23-pound grasshopper." "Man's 174 MPH Sneeze Blows Wife's Hair Off." "Satan's... — Updated 6/15/2020

 

Laugh Again

Love according to kids Sometimes we run out of wise advice on love, so we ask kids about it. Eric, age 6, was asked, "What exactly is marriage?" He said, "Marriage is when you get... — Updated 4/9/2020

 

Laugh Again

Ah, winter. That season when our mothers draped us in 40 pounds of parka, thick mittens and winter boots so heavy you could barely walk to school. "You'll catch your death of... — Updated 4/8/2020

 

Laugh Again

A little boy asked a friend, "How do you spell mousetrap? The friend said, "C-A-T." How is your spelling? Winnie the Pooh said, "My spelling is wobbly; it's good spelling but it... — Updated 4/7/2020

 

Laugh Again

I love baseball. Oh, I know it isn't as fast paced as golf or lawn bowling, but I enjoy the delicate game of cat and mouse between pitcher and batter. The tension of a ninth inning... — Updated 6/3/2019

 

Closet Monkey

One summer night during a thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. He asked in a trembling voice, "Will you stay with me all night?" She gave him a warm, reassuring hug... — Updated 4/5/2019

 

Laugh Again

It's the start of a New Year. A new beginning. New hope. Some people resolve to get some exercise-to start walking between the fridge and the couch, rather than using a scooter.... — Updated 2/1/2019

 

Christmas Traditions

My older brothers had a favorite Christmas tradition. They used to save up the cardboard tubes from rolls of wrapping paper and whap me with them Christmas Eve until my mother made... — Updated 11/24/2018

 

Hope for Monique

I was speaking at a summer camp for aboriginal teens. The rule with teens is that if you get one of them by himself or herself he or she has many, many functioning brain cells. Put... — Updated 9/10/2018

 

It's Cultural

As a well-traveled North American, I'm fascinated by culture. I've been in every Canadian province and most U.S. States. In Nova Scotia, my wife and I were treated like family by... — Updated 7/17/2018

 

Laugh Again

It seems like last Thursday that our kids were teenagers. People would ask, "What do you do?" and I would say, "I follow teenagers around the house. I shut lights off. It's a full... — Updated 5/21/2018

 

Missiles in Paradise

What would you do if you had nine minutes to live? My wife and I were in Hawaii. I was preparing to speak the next day. I know, it's a tough life. All that sand in your shorts.... — Updated 3/16/2018

 

Big Hairy Deal

Have you ever complained? My daughter worked as a server, so she knows a little about complaints. Here are a few grievances aired in eateries. I think it's important to tell you tha... — Updated 1/4/2018

 

You Big Baby

A short time ago, after a short courtship our son was married. “The time is short,” he said. “We’re thirty.” So he married Dallas, a short girl. Actually, she’s not... — Updated 10/5/2017

 

Laugh Again

Cathy decided to meet her friend Jane after not seeing her for several months. When they met, Cathy exclaimed: “Jane! How did you lose all that weight?” Jane replied: “It’s... — Updated 7/15/2017

 

Laugh Again

I love to win. I imagine you do too. I don’t meet many who say, “Some of my fondest memories involve being clobbered in checkers and belted at backgammon.” You don’t hear... — Updated 5/12/2017

 

LAUGH AGAIN

There are seven wonders of the world. But for a child there are millions. We were in a mall and my granddaughter couldn’t get over how many people there were. She had to say hi... — Updated 3/13/2017

 

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