When I reflect on my life, as I'm about to turn 55 on July 01, 2023, my heart and my mind keep going to the topic of wisdom. As an Indigenous man who's also from the Sixties Scoop generation, and whose mother and uncles and aunts went to residential school, I realize we were all left with what is called intergenerational trauma. As a follower of the Jesus Way who's born again and set free from sin, I'm also told in the holy scriptures from the apostle Paul that our struggle with sin takes place in three places. It takes place with the world, the flesh and the evil one.
I've also come across situations and circumstances that fit into the categories of testing, trials and sufferings. Paul also spoke about these three as well. Later on in life I found out that I was affected by Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD), as well as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder(ADHD). I know we can't always use this diagnosis we get from medical professionals as an excuse to be a victim. Yet facts are facts, and this is the tension we live in this side of heaven.
Then there are other life situations we come across, such as my 22-year-old daughter having cancer for the second time since she was 16. I've been her main caregiver throughout this whole struggle, so I've experienced what is called vicarious trauma-a type of trauma that comes to people who watch others suffer get. As chaplain at the Salvation Army in Edmonton, I see mirrors of myself in the men I talk to day after day. This reminds me of the miracle my life is, considering everything that's happened in my background.
After one of my daughter's last hospital visits when one of the doctors started referring our family to palliative care services, my brother was consoling me. One of the things he said to me to encourage me and give me brotherly guidance was to tell me to ask for wisdom. He did this in response to my saying that as I navigate this journey with my daughter, as well as with my wife and other children, I want wisdom to know what to say and what not to say. Why? Because I don't want to make this situation worse than it needs to be, regardless of the outcome.
James, who was a half-brother to Jesus, gave some sage advice for us all to take into our hearts, as we all need healing from what life throws at us. He said in James 1: 2–4 (NLT), "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing."
Then James went on to say in verses 5–7 (NLT), "If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord."
One of the morning prayers I say to God when I wake up is, "Dear Heavenly Father, I ask for wisdom today to know what to say and what not to say, what to do and what not to do." Then I ask for strength, joy and peace as we all navigate this journey with Ashley-a strength, joy and peace that can only come from God. As my brother reminded me, when we ask God for wisdom, He gives it to us. So, as I'm navigating this time, I want wisdom above all else. To help my heart to heal from all of life's curve balls, fast balls and spit balls.
When I reflect on my life, I acknowledge the facts before me such as everything that has happened to me, but I also acknowledge that I'm not a victim, and part of that acknowledgment is to ask for wisdom. James knew the value of wisdom; especially since he didn't believe that his own half-brother was the Savior of the world until after Jesus was crucified. King Solomon knew the value of wisdom when he was about to rule a nation. I know the value of wisdom from being someone who's lived almost 55 years on planet earth.
What are your trials, testings, and sufferings you've gone through and are still going through? Why do you need wisdom? What has happened to you? How are you dealing with it? Who are the people in your support system? Who are the people that love and accept you? Are you afraid to ask for help? If so, why? Do you really believe that God wants to heal your broken heart no matter what your journey has entailed? I encourage you to reach out and ask for wisdom. You won't regret it.
Parry Stelter: husband, father, author, speaker, writer, scholar, workshop
facilitator, blanket exercise facilitator, pastor, chaplain,
and ambassador
of the gospel. Visit
his
website at http://www.wordofhopeministries.ca
