Intertribal Life Newspaper -

Tabloids do their best to start rumours. Here are a few headlines I'm not making up: "Farmer shoots 23-pound grasshopper."

"Man's 174 MPH Sneeze Blows Wife's Hair Off."

"Satan's Skull Found. Bible experts call it the find of the century."

Speaking of the devil, I heard a rumour that he was going out of business. He had a Blow Out Sale at his store there on 666th Avenue, offering to sell his tools to the highest bidder. His minions welcomed customers with sneers. Tools were marked down and showcased: pride, hate, greed, lust, anger, deceit, and the rights to some TV shows he's been writing for...