Intertribal Life Newspaper -

LONDON, UK—Usain Bolt’s frisky relationship with Olympic solemnity is some of the best entertainment at the London Games. But when it comes to ranking the greatest Olympians ever, Bolt is nowhere near the top of the list. The worship Bolt shouts for belongs more rightly to a 100-year-old dead man who hardly ever spoke up for himself, Native American Jim Thorpe.

Bolt has sprinted hard into immortality; he is indisputably the fastest man ever, and maybe one of the most cheerful, too. It doesn’t hurt that he knows how to freeze for the cameras while we’re still trying to recover from the breathle...