Intertribal Life Newspaper -

I spend too much time alone and my world and my life have become small. I read a self-help book that said if I was in a rut and I wasn’t happy with my life, to do three new things in one week and it would change my life. The book promised I’d meet new people, make new friends and have an adventure.

I knew I needed to make the effort or I was going to turn into a hermit so I decided the first thing I’d do would be to attend a new church, share in a different kind of service and meet people.

That Sunday I attended a big mega-church. It was huge, thousands of people in the congregation. Giant TV screens surrounded the sanctuary and the service was broadcast on the screens. There was a rock band, a coffee bar in the entrance and there were cup holders on the pews. People were drinking coffee during the service and some of them were eating donuts.

When the music began, many of the people started dancing. The gentleman next to me got down on his knees to pray. At least I thought that’s what he was doing until he fell over. I still thought he might be praying when he laid on the floor but he didn’t look well.

I turned to the woman next to me and asked her if the man on the floor was all right. She set down her coffee cup and bent over him and waved for an usher. Then a dozen people suddenly appeared and decided the man was having a heart attack.

The fire department was called and then an ambulance and he was carried away. The service didn’t stop or even slow down. At the end of the service it was announced Mr. Stevens had a mild heart attack but was doing fine.

The next thing I did was join a chess club. I like chess. I’m sort of a medium player, not great, not awful, sort of medium. When I went to the club I discovered two things. I was the only woman with about forty men and they were all very serious chess players. This wasn’t a game with them, it was their life. I didn’t belong there. There were fifteen tables set up, with thirty men playing chess. There was total silence in the room except for the sound of the clocks on each table to time the moves.

I was seated at a table with an older gentleman and I knew I was in over my head. We each made three moves, then I got nervous and made a mistake. I moved a pawn in front of his bishop. His bishop can take my pawn. I was going to lose my pawn. It was a bad move.

Suddenly a whisper started through the room. “She’s sacrificing her pawn!” someone said.

“Why would she sacrifice her pawn?” someone else asked.

Suddenly everyone stopped playing chess and gathered around my table. I’d made a mistake and now everyone was there to see what I was doing. My poor lonely little pawn was out in the middle of the chessboard.

My opponent should have taken my pawn. I had no defense, the pawn was unprotected. It was such a stupid mistake, a bad move, none of them could believe I did it.

The only way to explain it was if it was a trap. My opponent was convinced it was a trap and refused to take my pawn. He took his bishop and retreated across the board. No one could figure out my strategy. I’d bluffed him. I just smiled. Everyone returned to their tables and finished their games.

I lost the game of course, but my opponent did ask me what trap I had set for him with my pawn. I told him I wanted to keep it a secret so I could use it another time.

I’m not going back to the chess club. I can’t bluff my way through again.

My third adventure happened when I was invited to attend a Hindu East Indian wedding. The bride was beautiful in a sari with veils. She had henna tattoos on her face and hands.

The groom was handsome in his own traditional wedding costume. The ceremony was long and complicated. There was music and dancing and a feast.

It was a festive, happy celebration until after the ceremony when the bride changed her mind, decided she didn’t want to be married and refused to sign the marriage certificate. She got into a car with her sister and left. The wedding party was in turmoil. People were crying, people were shouting. The marriage wasn’t legal without the signed papers. The groom had come from India to get married to the woman who was an American citizen. If he didn’t marry her, he had to return to India in two weeks.

An announcement was made. Would all the single, unmarried women in the room please raise their hands. I raised my hand.

A few minutes later the groom came over and asked, “Will you marry me?” I have to get married or leave America in two weeks!”

I told him I was honored and flattered but he was too young for me. We were complete strangers and I was very sorry about what happened but I was sure he’d find a good woman who would love him and marry him.

I tried three new things this week. I did meet a lot of people, helped a man who had a heart attack, bluffed a whole chess club and could have married an East Indian man half my age so he could stay in America.

Maybe next week I’ll try three more new things.

Crying Wind is the author of Crying Wind and My Searching Heart, When the Stars Danced, and Thunder in Our Hearts, Lightning in Our Veins. All her books are available from Indian Life. Check catalog on page 18.